The past week has been a difficult one for me, I've been struggling with some things for a while as far as how I am physically and it all seemed to culminate in this past week. I've been getting dizzy spells and passing out, and have a constant headache that seems to get worse with time rather than wain. We are getting some things figured out with this, most of it we believe is due to iron deficiency and low blood sugar, things that will take a while to build back up. In the mean time I've felt rather stuck. I can't move around a whole lot because of the pain(one of the times I fell I hurt my back). Also my family doesn't want me doing a whole lot and going over while in a potentially dangerous situation, so far I have been fortunate in that each time I have collapsed there has been nothing for me to hit my head on or anything. So I've mostly been in my room or on the couch, this has been rather frustrating to me as I feel that there is things I should be doing. But even writing this our is difficult because of the headache, I'm finding it hard to focus on things.
As I was contemplating this earlier this morning I was growing increasingly frustrated. Not only withe my current situation but with other things going on in my life. I've been reading John MacArthur's The Anatomy of the Church, and while I find it very helpful and insightful, I always come away from my reading somewhat discouraged, I can read these things and be challenged by them but cannot actually do anything about them, God created me a woman, so, while I can serve in the church, it is not my place to speak about these things, that is the elder's and men's roles.
But God showed me something, I'm sitting here unable to move around and do things as I normally would, I have a lot of time on my hands, and I'm seeing all these things going on around me that concern me, but am unable to do anything about... not true, I can pray!
Prayer is something that is very often neglected in my own life, not that I don't do it, but that it becomes somewhat rote. I do it because it is what I have always done, and often I am praying pretty much the same thing over and over.
I have often read and have come in many circumstances to see the truth of this, that when you are experiencing difficulties and struggling in your walk, one of the best things you can do is get the focus off yourself and start serving others. I was unsure of how I could do this until I saw the potential this time in my life had for warring in prayer. Rather than sit here and pray that I start feeling better and get back to my life I started thinking of all the people around me that I know are struggling in one way or another and need prayer. It's basically everyone. So I just started praying for specific things that I know are going on right now that need prayer, I started about 9:30 this morning, went till noon, and found that I have just started on the tip of the iceberg, the Lord just kept bringing to mind more people and situations that need prayer and encouragement.